Anyone who has a two cents information
on finding a partner will tell you to put yourself out there by
attending social functions: Weddings, parties, Owambes, events
e.t.c. They will also tell you to look your best and aim to
impress.
While this advice has worked for a some people, it has left some
wondering if it is really worth it, possibly after they have attempted a
few and gotten nothing out of it.
Well, I took it upon myself to analyse social functions. Please keep an open mind.
I attended a social gathering this past
weekend and I took out time to observe the behavioural patterns of the
attendees; my findings were quite interesting. I noticed that a social
function where people are supposed to mingle and interrelate with one
another equally was anything but. There was a lot of skewed interests
and attentions. Everyone gravitated towards the better looking,
fun-loving, pleasant and well-dressed people. There was also some
attention passed to the popular ones or socialites regardless of how
they appeared and the rest just sat quietly and nursed their drinks,
wishing they could be more (who says you can’t). If you are looking to
attract a very suave partner with less than your best, you will be going
home very disappointed.
To make the best out of every function,
it is imperative to understand how best they work or you will find
yourself stuck in a not-so-social function. With the exception that you
are just going to enjoy good food and music (which can be done in your
house), you need to have a plan. There are four categories of people you
should look out for in every function: The Life-of-the-party, the wall
flowers, the game-scorers and the nitpickers.
The Life-of-the-party garners every
attention there is. They are well dressed and pulchritudinous in
appearance. They spend their time mingling and walking around. Why
shouldn’t they?
The Wall flowers are on the shy or
reserved side. Regardless of how the look or dress, they remain
relatively quiet and observe the party as it goes on. Most girls need to
leave this category.
The Game-scorers’ main aim is to
network. They go around exchanging numbers and propositioning the
opposite sex. (Married men who take of their rings are in this category
by default.)
The Nitpickers won’t dance, won’t drink,
won’t smile, won’t mingle and they have a problem with anyone caught
doing any of these. They always seem to know a thing or two about
everyone in the social gathering.
Any plans of attracting any potentially
big partner exponentially increases if you are either the life of the
party or a game-scorer. These set of people have the confidence to
approach anyone and strike up a conversation and the never show defeat
if they are turned down. The world celebrates the interesting.
If you are not in any of those
categories, all hope is not lost. You can start by talking to someone or
group of people who do not look too intimidating and then work your way
up. It is easier if you attend functions with a friend or with familiar
faces in them, that way, you don’t feel so out-of-place. At no point
must you appear desperate or bothersome. Keep your conversations light,
brief and casual to avoid revealing too much about yourself. A little
mystery is appreciated. Remember to have a positive, confident and
charming attitude; alcohol or a nice smile can help you accomplish this.
Now that you know how these functions
work, it would be a more rewarding experience when you are able to turn a
not-so-social function into the best possible outcome, while having
fun, of course.
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